Conspiracy Theories: For or Against Jesus?

Just a quick post... I hung out with relatives this weekend, and inevitably the conversation trends towards "conspiracy theories".  So I let my relatives have it.  Yes as I'm speaking I sound intellectually disjointed and I have trouble getting my points across.  Even worse...I start to evaluate what are my points?

So, here are my points.  Ideally this should be what drives me.

I love my country. I think the world has benefited from the short Pax Americana that existed after World War II.  I see my country in self imposed decline now.  We do so many things wrong now.  Perhaps this is a spiritual imposed judgement on our leadership for our nation's sins.  Perhaps it is a deliberate conspiracy to weaken America.  Perhaps it is both or neither.  If I can contribute to saving my country, I will.  But this is not my primary mission. I've also become aware of past and current evil being done in my country's name, which makes me much less patriotic than I was.  But I still wish for American greatness, as I think the idealistic concept of America is worth pursing, even if it never existed in reality.  Perhaps the concept of America is a false idol to me.  I don't think so, but when I confuse the idealistic with the actual America and defend the wrong one is when I get into trouble.

I love to know "what is really going on".  Unfortunately (or actually fortunately) only God really knows what is going on.  The rest of us are just guessing.  I do know there is a spiritual side at play, a war for the souls of men.  Here is where I wish to contribute...to spreading the gospel of Jesus, that all men are justly condemned  before God, but God knowing our sinful state died for our sins.  If we trust Jesus, we are forgiven and restored to God.  That is good news!!!  But is that the news I preach?  No...it is not.  I tend to preach darkness, what the enemy may or may not be up to, and what evil men do and are rumored to be doing every day.  There is a disconnect here.  I need to stand back and analyze this further.  No, not just analyze, but correct my behavior.

Knowledge without it glorifying God is vanity.  Vanity is sin. If I am indulging is some sort of vanity in researching the pseudo or partial truths of the conspiracy world rather than preaching the good news of Jesus to the lost I am serving the enemy.

In my vanity I hoped that just preaching about the darkness I see, showing other's it's reality, would be enough to lead people to seek the God that can save them.  This is not the case.  "The goodness of God leads men to repentance."   I need to focus on that more.

I still will show the world the darkness because the world needs to understand what it truly is most of the time, a dark place.  But I need to be consistent with showing the light of the world, Jesus.

For the one or two that read this, please pray for me that I would find the right balance.  I know it begins at drawing closer to God and spending time with Him before looking into the dark corners of the world.